Let’s Quokka-bout Choices
My nephew sent out a family text with a strange photo containing the words, “Every decision in your life has led you to see this picture .” Though his photo was a disturbing AI rendering of a horse with human feet, I found the entire concept amusing and quite profound.
Considering everything you do, day to day, moment to moment, the movements and decisions you make have led you to this exact moment. And the next. And the next.
My sister’s dog was sleeping on the floor and suddenly got up, moved to his dog bed, and settled in again. I commented on his decision. We adjust our seating and locations for comfort and ease, but what changed in those seconds to make the dog decide that bed, as opposed to the carpet or another room, would be the best option in that moment?
We make choices everyday and have free will to do so. Whether we decide to play a video game a little longer, stay up 15 minutes later, or choose a healthy snack as opposed to the delicious goodie in the cabinet calling our name, we are always making decisions.
The choice to act on something or remain neutral, comment on someone’s post or stay out of the quagmire of social media discourse makes a difference in how we feel about others and ourselves.
So, then, why is it so hard for people to recognize consequences are the results of those choices that we freely made? Yeah, I’ll beat myself up later for eating that goodie in the cabinet, but it was good and no one forced it down my throat. Then again, I could recognize my choice, forgive myself, and recognize I can be decadent on occasion without the drama.
I saw an interview with Bette Midler, and she commented that in her early years of fame, she used to be rude to fans and tell them, “Get away from me!” She finally had a moment where a fan responded that he’d never watch her films again. She realized she should be nicer; her assistance said, “It’s about time you figured it out!”
Billy Bob Thornton commented that he enjoys his time with fans because he knows fans have paid his kids’ college tuition and keep a roof over his head. When handlers asked him why he spends so much time with fans, he said, “Why wouldn’t I?!” These celebrities have made conscious choices to be nice.
The recognition that we, as individuals, have choices is extremely empowering. Why re-act to people when you can be pro-active? Reactions mean you are waiting and allowing others to determine how you will choose to feel. For example, if you are driving down the road and someone tailgates, are you immediately going to be angry because the other driver is obviously pushy? Being proactive, you can prepare yourself by recognizing, yes, there are aggressive drivers on the road, but to be a safe driver and drive defensively, you let the angry driver pass (without issuing any type of aggravating salute!).
Why does it matter? Are they behaving dangerously? Yes, but you don’t have to be part of it. You aren’t going to stop them or change their behavior while on the road. You will probably never see them again. It doesn’t matter. Let them go and you both live another day.
Being aware of our own behaviors, taking control, and making the best decisions that suit us moment by moment is how we better ourselves.
Even if we feel we are living in the darkest of times, we have the power to actually be the light that changes the world. From moment to moment, one person at a time can make a difference. Recognize and embrace your power. You’ll be amazed by the joy and serendipity that greet you because of your choices.